It’s been about 20 years since _When Harry Met Sally..._schooled us on bogus orgasms, but just about every rom-com out there still mimics the hell out it. So, for the movie’s short film sequel, what more fitting way to pay back the kindness than mimic the biggest trend in culture: Harry meeting a vampire. Here, Crystal talks about the making of Funny or Die’s "Grampires: When Sharon Bit Harry," his recent plunge into the Twitterverse, and dirty talk with Helen Mirren.
GQ: Where’d you get the idea for the sequel?
**Billy Crystal: **I was at my grandson’s birthday party, which is around Halloween. He was dressed as a vampire and I said, "Well, I guess that makes me a grampire." I went, "Oop! This could be something."
GQ: What was it like pretending to make love to Helen Mirren in the film?
**Billy Crystal: **There wasn’t that much pretending! She was up for anything. The first thing she said when she met with us was "Don’t respect me."
GQ: Your daughter directed it. Awkward? Did she call you Daddy on set?
**Billy Crystal: **There was a scene where I knew it went fast. And she walked over and said "Billy, let’s just slow things down a little bit." Rob Reiner, who was in the hospital the day she was born, was like, _SHE CALLED YOU BILLY! _
GQ: Most big-screen movies require months of filming. This video took three days to make and you got nearly 800,000 hits in the first day. Are you done with regular films?
**Billy Crystal: **That video was enormous. The opening for it felt like one for a hit movie. I’m just thinking, I’m working in miniature now! Why do anything longer than four minutes?
GQ: You recently joined Twitter. Anyone you wish you could follow?
**Billy Crystal: **Probably Mark Twain. He’s the wittiest man who’s ever lived. Definitely not Einstein. How dull would he be? "E = MC2, then I’m going to the supermarket."
GQ: I have this friend with awful Jewdar. He somehow didn’t know you were Jewish until recently when he saw you on The Daily Show. Any advice for him?
**Billy Crystal: **Yeah, look for lots of excessive shrugging, complaining, and someone who’s always cold. That should do it.
